What Makes a Man?

There are two general type of species in the Earth; Male and Female. Of the two, most people consider the first one to be the strongest. But for me, it depends on the definition. Opinionated, I believe that Male is strong in hiding their own feeling and moving on, while Female's strength is to be able to get through anything. 

I can tell as for my Family has always been a mixed one. I have my Mom and my Sister, whose, every people who knew me really well, can say how strong they have been not only for themselves but for the whole Family.

My Father is a lovable one, I can say though I have lived with him only for the first five years of my life. Every one who knew him cherish him well, even if they are not really a member of our family. He really has a big heart.

As for my Brothers, I can say that they are: "Man enough". Why?

For my Eldest Brother, I have admired him since he stood firm when facing his girlfriend's untimely pregnancy years ago (my Bright Eldest Niece is now ten!) and I am admiring him now as he wake up everyday for work and for continuing his Education despite of his age to make sure that he would be able to provide a good future for his daughters.

For my second Eldest Brother, whom after every fall, kept his Faith with God and admitted his faults and is now trying to build his own life and Family in the right way. 

But of all of them, I can say that the youngest is the strongest one.

Ped Jr is one of the most successful men I have met. In his young age, he is now a CPA, Assistant Manager, a Provider of the Family, a Talented Guitarist, Sports lover and a much loved friend, a Mentor of his siblings and a very balanced guy. 

But above those achievements, he will always be the same baby Bro that I grew up with. The only sibling that I had played out the streets during our youngsters years, the small guy who felt so big and heroic when he challenged my second older brother during the times when the latter was brawling against me (peace to kuya Perry, you know how sibling fights were =D) while saying "wag mo awayin ang ate ko!", that boy whom helped me make up stories and make face about how we took afternoon nap but really did not do it because we don't see the essence of sleeping for kids rather the fun of playing outside rain or shine, that same guy whom I learned how to cook meals, wash dishes, clean up mess when the elders "graduated" from household chores, that person who I always asked to buy female things for me, that only guy who agree to me when I try to fix his hair with no style at all!

He will always be the same person whom I always look up to coming during weekends and rest days so I can talk about how our lives have been. I will always look forward his matured advices and brotherly "sermon" on how I am living my life. Our grocery out and shawarma eat out with Mama, the videoke and movie watching at home, the out of town trips with the special people of our lives.

Well I know that these things would not happen forever, we would grow older, but I know we would never grow apart in heart as siblings.

But why can I say that he is indeed the strongest? Well simply because he is man enough to tell people what's wrong and what should it have been. At the same time, he knew how to keep mum of his feelings but he make sure that everyone knew where he stands. That's Ped, that's my brother.

Well, this note is actually for him. I have promised him that I'll write up one for him and it feels that this day is quite perfect for me to do it. It's an Advance Birthday Gift Bro! I will always be here for you as you have been for me and the family. We love you Bunso!!!

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Untitled: Valentines...

Is there such a thing as unconditional love nowadays? Except of course of the Divine Love from the Creator.

Why do people always set up a certain qualification before saying the words "I Love You"? Why do we need to look up to someone's status, plans and whatever before settling with the feeling that is on your heart?

Is it love? Or just a simple insecurity that you can not live with someone who did not pass your so called requirements? I thought love is an involuntary feeling? Why do most people always have this checkpoint? Can't they just accept the fact that no one is ever perfect enough meet standards?

Or is it like a balance between heart and mind? Not a bad thing either. But it is not love anymore. I call it merely securing your life. And if it is, then it basically goes against all the love song that were made and being aired on Radio Stations, being downloaded and being saved in Discs for selling. It is not love, not within what it should really be. 

But I can not say that there is no unconditional love nowadays. Looking around me, there are unperfect couples, but they stayed with each other. They may not be happy as they were before, but they never easily gave up when things get wrong. They try to fight together and work out things together. 

They stay against all odds, against knowing what life had been for them together, against knowing their differences.

That is, ultimately, LOVE for me. 

Just my two cents. Happy Valentines 2013.

Big SIS

Who among you have an eldest sister? I do. And most of my friends does.

After living the years of my life, I came to realise some facts about them. And these are significant points which inspires me to write this Note about them:

First, in the younger years, these Big SIS are not appreciated by her siblings. Most big Sis are "contrabida" at home, someone who always makes taray and away those pasaway. Someone who always been perfect and see the imperfection of the other people at home. Someone who had been an achiever and expects the same from her youngsters. Someone who would wake you up early in the morning and tell you how lazy you are and someone who would yell at you at night so you could sleep early. Someone who is a Fun Buster, a disciplinarian, a Role Model. Someone we used to hate because we are compared to them. Someone who always points out money being spent for nothing, while for you it was everything.

Latter part in life, these Big SIS will not leave you until you do the right thing, which is kinda annoying for younger siblings. She would help you, but of course, you would hear her talked about it over and over, which younger ones would consider as 'sumbat'. She would make you feel how less achiever you are since you can't race through her series of medals and recognitions. And  when you make mistakes, she is the first one to scold you about it.

Well those are kind of facts. Young ones should admit these. Big SIS are less appreciated in most families, probably most hated. But people never realise how lucky a person can be if he or she had an older sister. They overlooked the fact that Big SIS are like that because most of them pursue the best out of their brothers and sisters. They make taray everyday to make you realise that what you are doing is not acceptable. They seized to achieve everything to inspire you that nothing is impossible through hard work. She makes you value rest and sleep because she knew you would need those in the future. She chose to be frugal with resources because she knew how hard it is without it. She keeps her nose in everything you do because she does not want you to do the same mistake that either of you made before. She does not make sumbat though it sounds like that, it was just firm reminder for you to learn. She would never leave you until you learn your lesson and start changing.

All Big SIS just does that: Tough Love. Yes, they love their siblings, even in their own tough and firm ways. Because they had felt first the hardships in life and they do not have enough time to sugar coat the facts for their younger siblings. 

But like any other human, they all have soft sides. They can be hurt and tired of the role they play. Unlike their younger brother and sister, they does not have an older sibling to cry on and lean on. They do not have an older sibling to turn to and defend them in times of hurting. So they need to be strong, not for themselves, but for their siblings.

That's how hard their role is and having it said, that's how we should appreciate them.

This goes out for those Eldest Sister who feels that same hatred from their own siblings with the praying that one day they would realise they are wrong and would appreciate you and heed your advices. Like I did with my only Ate., well, after all she is my ultimate Idol =D

Someday

Life have been so challenging these past two years. I have not even managed to realized that it almost took me two years to write a blog again.

After the last blog when I was offered a job, I am now given a opportunity to lead a team, be a people manager and be one of whom I always look up to. 

It was not easy, especially for a start up company as I used to have established ones. Or maybe I am not yet that fit to be here as I am still pursuing my studies. 

People tell me to give up either of the two. At first I was challenged, but then I realized, it was not really fair for both, and I simply can not serve two masters faithfully. 

But still God is good. I am trying to manage both of them, my personal life and all.

Someday, I know that time will come when I can be where I really want to be. I always believe in having the reason behind, whatever that might be, I know I need to be strong that would take a lot. 

I just wished that I have done better before. Oh geez, I do not want to ever regret, but this would be the first time. I just felt so tired today, so tired that I just want to break apart. But I know I have not given my best yet. Not now. Semester Break is still a long way to run.